Today I took a long walk on the beach with my dog, as I often do on Sunday mornings. The beach is “my place” – it truly makes me feel good. I don’t go as often as I’d like, but when I do it’s like pushing a reset button. I feel so wonderful for the remainder of the day. It’s the sound of the waves crashing, the color of the ocean – which always changes, the smells of salt water and seaweed, and the cries of the gulls – the connection with nature. There is such magic there for me every time, and even if I don’t make it as often as I’d like to walk the sand, I see it every day (because I live close) and walk trails that have views of the ocean, and it makes me feel happy.

I realized during my journey through divorce healing that I needed to find these calming places even more. I started walking and hiking with my dog every day – I would do 5-6 miles daily (split into early morning and late afternoon), and nature became a necessity – like my black tea in the morning. I craved her presence and silence and beauty, and she in turn helped me heal and find presence within her beauty.

If you are journeying from divorce to find your bliss, it is imperative to find those places that make you feel good – and find a way to visit them as often as possible. It could be a majestic tree in your neighborhood, a lake or trail, or a place you can simply sit and look at a view that inspires you. When we are entangled in sorting out a mass of emotions and trying to learn who we are outside of partnership, these experiences not only calm us and bring joy, but they also bring strength — the knowing that we CAN – because they enable us to be present and quiet.

Here are some guidelines once you find your place to help you heal and reap the true benefits:

1. Turn off all electronics and avoid distractions (like bringing coffee, food, friends, or going somewhere that is loud or full of people, etc.)

2. Sit quietly and use all your senses – smell the air, notice all the colors and how the light plays in your space, listen to the sounds (even if it is silent – especially if this is the case!), and simply breathe.

3. After your experience make sure to journal about it – how you felt, what you experienced.

4. Visit this space at least once a week, more if possible. Notice how you feel after a few weeks.

I’d love to hear about the place where you feel good when you visit, and your own experience healing and visiting this place(s). It’s so good to talk about it, because you may not have even recognized how you feel when you go there, and doing so will help you heal. 🦋