One of the biggest lessons I learned when I was healing from divorce was to free my inner child. I talk about this in my book because when I realized this it was like a door opened. I was having a conversation yesterday with a gal who is studying Expressive Art Therapy, and it got me thinking that it would be great to share some of the things I did to help me heal.

In the last years of my marriage I felt a great deal of pressure and I was unhappy. Once I started diving into this I realized that my inner child had literally been locked up inside me, and she needed to come out to play. So here are some of the things I did to fix this – I still do all of these now, especially if I am having a challenging day or feeling down for some reason.

1. Dance. This has to be a favorite of mine. When I am feeling down, frustrated, or not myself I turn on the music and let my body move. This is my greatest physical and emotional release. You can be silly, sultry, dramatic – whatever feels fun. Simply let your body feel the music and move in whatever way it wants.

2. Color/draw. When I was healing I bought several coloring books, markers, colored pencils and gel pens, and I colored – usually at the end of the day as I avoided TV. It accomplished several things – it allowed me to escape as I focused on creating something, and it calmed my nervous system. You can also draw or sketch – no matter which you choose these creative tasks really take you away for a bit and make you feel better.

3. Cook/bake. This is another favorite, and I love to experiment in the kitchen and make delicious meals and healthy sugar-free desserts (yes, there IS such a thing). Again, being creative truly gets your mind focused on fun, positive tasks which make you feel great. If you invite friends over everyone can share in the fun and enjoy eating it afterwards.

4. Make music. Even if you don’t know how to play an instrument you can make music with all kinds of things you have around the house. You can also sing, or even sign up for a class to learn a musical instrument or how to sing. Another great idea: invite friends over and have a karaoke party – I guarantee it will come with many laughs! Music is so powerful for healing, and learning to create it is fun and fulfilling.

5. Art projects. Remember when you were a kid and did art projects all the time – in school, at summer camp and parties, and at home. I loved doing projects, and when I went to summer camp art time was one of my favorites. As we grow into adulthood most of us stop doing this (long before, realistically), but if you are a parent it is so fun to do art with your kids. I used to find fun projects for my kids to do with their friends when they had playdates, and also at their birthday parties.

For artsy ideas you can check the internet or (even more fun in my opinion) wander the aisles of a craft store. You’ll be amazed how you feel during and after your art session, especially if you experience it with fun people.

6. Write. Hopefully you are writing in a journal regularly during your healing process – this writing should be different. Be fun, whimsical, tell a story or invent a fun character and live her amazing life through your descriptions. There are no limits.

7. Other ideas. Fly a kite, do a puzzle, jump on a trampoline, go roller or ice skating, play board games, make stained glass or papier mache, jump in the ocean or at a lake…the sky is the limit!

There are SO many fun ways to let out your inner child, and I encourage you to invite your friends to join in. The great news is that acting like a child works to take a load off your shoulders, and also invites deeper pondering afterward. Let me know what you try and how it goes! 🦋